YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ME

YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ME

I'm alone for a reason

It's hard to explain

I'm bitter in all seasons

I'm full of pain

You don't want to hang out

You want to know me, that I doubt

No one knows the half of my story

I stay silent about it and keep it to me

I keep the fake smile on my face

While my mind is in a dark place

Just a day away from a nervous breakdown

When it happens you don't want to be around

I don't have a reason to care anymore

Really, why am I even living for?

Nothing to really look forward to

No one really wants to hear the truth

This is me, I can't change the way I am

But as always, nobody really understands

It goes deeper than reading some positive quote

Or something inspiring that somebody wrote

To change the way I think and feel inside

To change the thoughts going on in my mind

Eating myself to death but I can't help myself

It's my only happiness, I have nothing else

I guess I'm trying to fill that empty void in my soul

And just for a little while, I do seem whole

But after some time that feeling goes away

And I'll just fell sad the rest of the day

I don't like being touched or even being hugged

I don't talk to family, I don't like meeting up

I stay out of contact with people, I don't pick up the phone

And when I do, I tell people to just leave me alone

I don't want to talk about what's bothering me

It's so much deeper than what you can see

If I open that door, I'll never be able to close it again

And it will just lead me to my untimely end

So I just can't be what people want me to be

I'm one messed up person, you don't want to know me

©2013 Darryl Mouzone